my birthday present from brumal and rollersluut was definitely my favorite.

it consisted of this lovely card, a giraffe growth chart so that i can track my increasing height as i grow up, a bottle of yazi ginger vodka, and getting rick rolled in person.

i have no idea how they found that record.

lol times a million.

kirt took me out to dinner at nishino which was delicious.

upon arrival home, i discovered that my entire bedroom had been filled with balloons.

they coated the room, my bed, the ceiling/wall, and the floor.

i couldn't stop laughing. it is really hard to find clothes and get dressed now, though. luckily i am a total slob so this is actually pretty similar to the normal state of affairs in my room. it's just brighter and more buoyant.

i'm 26 today. i wonder when i'll actually have a birthday where i feel like the age that the numbers say.
26 still sounds terribly old when i say it aloud.

last year around the time of my birthday matos loaned me his new apartment and i had some people over. one of the projects was to dress up in weird costume gear that i had laying around, take photos of each other with a lomo-type camera, and record tracks together. brian/amanita brought his multitrack minidisk recorder over. then it disappeared.

i was pretty out of it. i have this vague memory of someone coming and picking it up but i can't remember who. now he's messaging me wanting it back, saying that he never got it back :( if it was you or if you know who might have taken it, please let me know.. i think it was a girl! damn my old nonfunctional mind.

time to buy myself two exciting birthday presents:
1) 40 gig iPod
2) something from toys in babeland

still feelin' morose, though.. that's typical for this day every year. hopefully i'll snap out of it. i tried to nap but now i feel like i'm crawling out of the bottom of a well with bungee hooks.

today condor and i went to the underground tour. i liked wandering around in a catacomb beneath the city. we looked up through the skylights at people's feet as they walked above us. the tour guide discussed mainly 1) whores and 2) shit. i won't spoil it for those who haven't gone by explaining any further. it was exciting to learn that the term "skid row" originated in seattle. i enjoyed it more than condor did. he wriggled periodically. we snuck away before it was over. we discussed martha stewart. we wonder how she will decorate her jail cell.

i stopped by my mom's house. she tried to foist birthday presents upon me. i told her that i didn't want them yet. "my birthday isn't until wednesday." she tried to push them on me again. apparently she has plans that day and they don't have time for me to come over and unwrap them. i said "can't i come over some other day after my birthday then?" she put the presents in a bag for me to take home. i deliberately "forgot" the bag on the floor when i left. i really don't know why i am so traditional about that kind of thing. i don't even want presents to begin with.. but if i do get them, opening them early somehow spoils the experience.

it's hard to believe that in only 9 days i'll be 1/4 of a century old. i'm going through a stereotypical midlife crisis.. who am i? where am i going? i don't know what to do for my birthday.. originally i was thinking about throwing a party, but the idea of cleaning my house and organizing something feels beyond me.

listening to UR via dj hell.. so apropros.

"am i happy with who i am? am i happy with the people around me?
am i happy with what i am doing? am i happy with the way my life is going?
do i have a life, or am i just living?
will i die never knowing what i could've been or could've done?

do not let these questions restrain or trouble you.
just point yourself in the directions of your dreams
(la direccion de tus suenos)
find your strength in the sound
and make your transition..."